People who have a fearful avoidant attachment style have a lot of love to give but a hard time expressing it. This ambivalence can lead to mixed signals, where they may feel intense emotions but struggle to express them openly and consistently. A first step you can take is to begin relating to yourself more openly and honestly. Journal what it is that you’re feeling and needing. Begin nourishing yourself in these ways. This practice will help you make more sense of your internal experiences, thus making it easier to express it with others.
Here is how *Sarah (name change, true story) went from struggling with intimacy (FA) and relationships for NINE years to finally feeling DEEPLY connected and secure, and feeling ON 👏TOP👏OF👏THE👏WORLD. She is no one special (she is of course…but you know what I mean!), and if she could transform from a committed fearful avoidant then so can you. All you have to do be willing to do the work. No more research, and hanging on the fence, but do💪the💪damn💪work. It's not an easy feat, and it requires lots of courage, vulnerability, and perseverance. But you can do it.💯 AND I'm here to support you, to cheer you on, and to help you through the challenges Comment SECUREME, if you're ready to take control of your relationships AND become super secure. Shabana P.S If you join early, you will have exclusive dibs to private community support just for us secure attachers…) #fearfulavoidant #fearfulavoidantattachment #dismissiveavoidant #secureattachmentstyle #secureattachment #securerelationships #ConnectionGoals #OvercomeAnxiety #loveandtrusttoallah
Sending love to all my avoidants doing the work 🫶🏼 Realize that what activates or triggers you into your avoidant behaviors tends to be unique to each individual, so working with someone to uncover these activations can be helpful in working through them and heal, so that you can bring your present, authentic, secure self to the relationship and connect from the heart, and not self-sabotage out of the connection you crave. Remember, attachment styles are fluid and you can work to build a secure attachment and partnership. This is what help my clients with. Message to schedule a consult and start coaching 1-on-1 🤍 And follow for more dating & relationship tips! #avoidant #avoidantattachment #avoidantattachmentstyle #fearfulavoidant #fearfulavoidantattachment #fearfulavoidantattachmentstyle #anxiousattachment #anxiousattachmentstyle #attachmentstyles #emotionalintelligence #datingcoach #relationshipcoach #datingtips #relationshiptips #relationshipexpert #relationshipadvice #victoriamiretti
Do not normalize what you should change…… #attachment #attachmenttheory #attachmentstyle #anxiousattachment #dismissiveavoidant #fearfulavoidantattachment
Sending love to all my anxious attachers doing the work 🫶🏼 Everyone is unique in what anxious tendencies they have and what activates them into those tendencies, which is why it’s important to work with someone to uncover these activations and heal, so that you can bring you present, secure self to a relationship and not self-sabotage out of the connection you crave, or suffer through it. Remember, attachment styles are fluid and you can work to build a secure attachment and partnership. This is what help my clients with. Message to schedule a consult and coach 1-on-1. And follow for more dating & relationship tips! #anxiousattachment #anxiousattachmentstyle #avoidant #avoidantattachment #avoidantattachmentstyle #fearfulavoidant #fearfulavoidantattachment #fearfulavoidantattachmentstyle #attachmentstyles #emotionalintelligence #datingcoach #relationshipcoach #datingtips #relationshiptips #relationshipexpert #relationshipadvice #victoriamiretti
WHEN DOES INDEPENDENCE GO FROM EMPOWERMENT TO DEFENCE? I grew up in a world where independence was worn as a badge of honour. And whilst I fully believe healthy independence and a strong sense of self should be strived for, for me I didn't want to rely on people for emotional support because I wasn't sure that people couldn’t be trusted or be relied on. So my independence wasn’t born out of empowerment, it was born out of defence. A huge part of my journey was allowing myself to be vulnerable enough to fall in love and let someone see the real me, but that didn’t happen overnight. I built up to it. I had to practice little by little by asking friends or family for help, opening up emotionally about how I felt and letting the walls down. I then practiced setting boundaries and telling romantic partners what I was looking for, and being more vulnerable when it felt safe. You see, for me, true independence is having a solid sense of self that isn’t reliant on other people’s opinions and approval. It’s also having the internal strength and security to expect and allow people to meet your needs and to rely on others just as they rely on you. In other words you choose to need people. Follow me @the.compatibility.coach on have to get the most out of your love life C x
You got this!
🌷Are you outside in oriented? #anxiousattachment #disorganizedattachment #fearfulavoidantattachment #attachment #drkimsage #peoplepleaser #fawning #compulsivecaretaking
Send us a Dm! #avoidant #avoidantattachment #avoidantattachmentstyle #fearfulavoidant #fearfulavoidantattachment #fearfulavoidantattachmentstyle #anxiousattachment #anxiousattachmentstyle #attachmentstyles #emotionalintelligence #datingcoach #relationshipcoach #datingtips #relationshiptips #relationshipexpert #relationshipadvice #victoriamiretti
Message me on Instagram for any kind of hacking Whatsapp hack | WhatsApp Spy Facebook hack and recovery Instagram hack and recovery | Snapchat hack I iPhone unlock Twitter unban Phone tracking Roblox uban Phone spy Bank hack Email hack and recovery YouTube channel recovery we do ethical hacking for good purpose and social media! #anxiousattachment #anxiousattachmentstyle #avoidant #avoidantattachment #avoidantattachmentstyle #fearfulavoidant #fearfulavoidantattachment #fearfulavoidantattachmentstyle #attachmentstyles #emotionalintelligence #datingcoach #relationshipcoach #datingtips #relationshiptips #relationshipexpert #relationshipadvice #victoriamiretti
Send us a Dm! #avoidant #avoidantattachment #avoidantattachmentstyle #fearfulavoidant #fearfulavoidantattachment #fearfulavoidantattachmentstyle #anxiousattachment #anxiousattachmentstyle #attachmentstyles #emotionalintelligence #datingcoach #relationshipcoach #datingtips #relationshiptips #relationshipexpert #relationshipadvice #victoriamiretti
Message me on Instagram for any kind of hacking Whatsapp hack | WhatsApp Spy Facebook hack and recovery Instagram hack and recovery | Snapchat hack I iPhone unlock Twitter unban Phone tracking Roblox uban Phone spy Bank hack Email hack and recovery YouTube channel recovery we do ethical hacking for good purpose and social media! #anxiousattachment #anxiousattachmentstyle #avoidant #avoidantattachment #avoidantattachmentstyle #fearfulavoidant #fearfulavoidantattachment #fearfulavoidantattachmentstyle #attachmentstyles #emotionalintelligence #datingcoach #relationshipcoach #datingtips #relationshiptips #relationshipexpert #relationshipadvice #victoriamiretti
Message me on Instagram for any kind of hacking Whatsapp hack | WhatsApp Spy Facebook hack and recovery Instagram hack and recovery | Snapchat hack I iPhone unlock Twitter unban Phone tracking Roblox uban Phone spy Bank hack Email hack and recovery YouTube channel recovery we do ethical hacking for good purpose and social media! #anxiousattachment #anxiousattachmentstyle #avoidant #avoidantattachment #avoidantattachmentstyle #fearfulavoidant #fearfulavoidantattachment #fearfulavoidantattachmentstyle #attachmentstyles #emotionalintelligence #datingcoach #relationshipcoach #datingtips #relationshiptips #relationshipexpert #relationshipadvice #victoriamiretti
Send us a Dm! #avoidant #avoidantattachment #avoidantattachmentstyle #fearfulavoidant #fearfulavoidantattachment #fearfulavoidantattachmentstyle #anxiousattachment #anxiousattachmentstyle #attachmentstyles #emotionalintelligence #datingcoach #relationshipcoach #datingtips #relationshiptips #relationshipexpert #relationshipadvice #victoriamiretti
HOW TO MAINTAIN THE HOPE WHEN DATING RATHER THAN BURNING OUT! Like SO many amazing people out there, it dating can be a bloody rollercoaster - some days you're all in, some days you have no energy. Some day's you're hopeful and some days you delete the apps and feel like it's never going to happen. But I don't believe that meeting someone, or 'finding' love has to always be hard, or draining. For example, if I could guarantee you will meet someone (I don't know when, where, or who), how would this change how you show up in the meantime? I'm guessing you'd be more relaxed, have more fun, be more open and enjoy the process more? Which in turn, means you take more risks, see more opportunities and show up as the happiest version of you, and therefore, it's more likely to happen quicker! So with clients when working on this, yes the dating 'strategy' is important, but it's the thing we do last. Looking at your mindset, your belief system, tackling issues like about time running out, and giving you the space to be more 'you' when dating, is far more important. The dating part is the tip of the iceberg, we have to look at what's underneath it first! If you'd like to have a chat about this, please do get in touch as I have a few 1:1 spaces available to start this month! C x
Communication is vital for navigating the complexities of relationships with those with a fearful avoidant attachment style. It can help build trust, reduce anxiety, and encourage emotional expression. However, remember that though you can work on your communication to support those you love better, they are responsible for doing their inner work to meet you halfway. More on this topic next week via the “Let’s Talk Attachments Podcast.” Stay tuned 🎧
The concepts included may or may not apply to every anxiously-attached individual. Everyone is unique in what anxious tendencies they have and what activates them into those tendencies, which is why it’s important to work with someone to uncover these activations and heal, so that you can bring you present, secure self to the relationship and not self-sabotage out of the connection you crave. Remember, attachment styles are fluid and you can work to build a secure attachment and partnership. This is what help my clients with. Message to schedule a consult and coach 1-on-1 And follow for more dating & relationship tips! #anxiousattachment #anxiousattachmentstyle #avoidant #avoidantattachment #avoidantattachmentstyle #fearfulavoidant #fearfulavoidantattachment #fearfulavoidantattachmentstyle #attachmentstyles #emotionalintelligence #datingcoach #relationshipcoach #datingtips #relationshiptips #relationshipexpert #relationshipadvice #victoriamiretti
Communication can make or break our relationships! New podcast episode on how to communicate with someone who has a dismissive avoidant attachment style. Link in bio 🎧
Continued: I also find it hard to ask for help or my needs because I was taught it’s best to be self-reliant. When you ask me what I need, it’s hard for me to come up with something, as I don’t have much experience with relying on others, but keep asking me. Just knowing you are open to meeting my needs goes a long way. And if I do ask for something or put boundaries in place, and it comes out a bit messy or from an exasperated place, please be patient with me as this is new to me. I’m working on it. All the concepts included in the letter may or may not apply to every avoidant. Every one is unique in what avoidant tendencies they have and what activates them into those tendencies, which is why it’s important to work with someone to uncover these activations and heal, so that you can bring your present, secure self to the relationship and not self-sabotage out of the connection you crave. Remember, attachment styles are fluid and you can work to build a secure attachment and partnership. This is what I help my clients with. Message to schedule a consult and coach 1-on-1 And follow for more dating & relationship tips! #avoidant #avoidantattachment #avoidantattachmentstyle #fearfulavoidant #fearfulavoidantattachment #fearfulavoidantattachmentstyle #anxiousattachment #anxiousattachmentstyle #attachmentstyles #emotionalintelligence #datingcoach #relationshipcoach #datingtips #relationshiptips #relationshipexpert #relationshipadvice #victoriamiretti
Communication is essential because it meets fundamental emotional needs that are at the root of our challenges. You can learn more about these needs for the anxious attachment style, how to address them, and helpful tips for effective communication via my latest podcast episode. Link in bio 🎧
It can feel like the world stops when we go through a breakup, especially if unexpected. Here are a few basic steps you can take to start moving towards closure. If you need more support, you can book a free Compatibility Call via the link in my bio ⬆️❤️🩹
Are you tired of being stuck in anxious attachment patterns? Do you feel desperate to make relationships work? I offer a personalized 8-week coaching program to guide you through these steps with accountability and support, helping you heal and build healthy relationships. You can start your healing journey today. DM me or comment „HYA“ below to apply for my 8-week Heal Your Attachment Coaching program. The regular price for the coaching program is $1599. But for Mother’s Day, I’m offering a special discount of 35%, bringing the price down to $1039 until May 20th. Let’s start your journey to healing and love together. #attachment #attachmentstyles #attachmenttheory #attachmentparenting #insecure #insecureattachment #secure #secureattachment #anxious #anxiousattachment #anxiouspreoccupied #dismissive #dismissiveattachment #dismissiveavoidant #dismissiveavoidantattachment #fearful #fearfulattachment #fearfulavoidantattachment #disorganized #disorganizedattachment #trauma #healing #goodreads #quotes
Send me a message for help. #selflove #boundaries #mentalhealth #anxiety #healing #mindset #empowerment #toxiclove #relationshipcoach #codependency #trauma #loveaddiction #attachmenttheory #needs #mindfulness #selfdevelopment #couples #relationships #attachmentstyles #selfhealers #attachmentissue #relationshipanxiety #anxiety #anxiousattachment #fearfulavoidantattachment #avoidantattachment #dismissiveavoidant #secureattachment #selfworth
I’ve observed two common types of dismissive avoidants, which are you? (and of course there could be more). Working with someone to uncover these activations can be helpful in working through them and heal, so that you can bring your present, authentic, secure self to the relationship and connect from the heart, and not self-sabotage out of the connection you crave. Remember, attachment styles are fluid and you can work to build a secure attachment and partnership. This is what help my clients with. Message to schedule a consult and start coaching 1-on-1 🫶🏼 And follow for more dating & relationship tips! #avoidant #avoidantattachment #avoidantattachmentstyle #fearfulavoidant #fearfulavoidantattachment #fearfulavoidantattachmentstyle #anxiousattachment #anxiousattachmentstyle #attachmentstyles #emotionalintelligence #datingcoach #relationshipcoach #datingtips #relationshiptips #relationshipexpert #relationshipadvice #victoriamiretti
Discover what’s holding you back in your relationships. 💃 Take our attachment style quiz now and find out how to break the patterns you’re stuck in. 🔄 👉🏻 Link in Bio (www.speak-honest.com/attachment-quiz) . . . #attachmenttheory #attachmentstyles #attachmentissues #quiz #speakhonest🧡 #attachmentdance #relationshipgoals #relationshipdance #attachmentquiz #disorganizedattachment #anxiousattachment #avoidantattachment #fearfulavoidant #secureattachment #dismissiveavoidant #fearfulavoidantattachment #heal
We don’t speak enough about the Fearful-Avoidant attachment and how it plays out in relationships. Yet, the Fearful-Avoidant attachment is more prevalent than people may think. Adults with fearful-avoidant attachment deeply crave closeness and emotional intimacy, yet they find themselves pulling away out of fear. This attachment style is marked by a mix of needing affection but struggling to trust it fully. These individuals often experience a rollercoaster of emotions in relationships, oscillating between moments of closeness and sudden urges to withdraw to protect themselves. . . . . . . . . . #fearfulavoidant #fearfulavoidantattachment #cptsd #mentalhealth #mentalhealthawareness #parenting #parentingtips #anxious #relationships #avoidantattachmentstyle #anxiousattachmentstyle #developmentaltrauma #attachmentstyles #attachment #avoidantattachment #anxiousattachment #secureattachment #cptsd #CPTSDawareness #traumahealing #trauma #trust #traumatherapy
As a society we’re a little obsessed with red flags! That’s because we tend to focus on what we DON’T want. We scan for danger, trying to save time and eliminate people, desperate to keep ourselves safe But part of meeting someone is getting into that magnetic energy of ease and joy and fun. That’s NOT going to happen if you’re scanning for red flags and what could go wrong. SO, after each date this month, why don’t you think of 10 good things about them. 👉 If you’d like to learn the secret to get into that gorgeous flow then I have THREE new spaces opening up in May/June! C x
This is your reminder that personal growth is not about becoming perfect and no longer struggling with anything. You've had certain habits and patterns your entire life. It will take many rounds of practice before responding in new ways becomes second nature. And in the beginning, you will realize why you got triggered, why you reacted the way you did, why you said what you said, why did what you did only in hindsight, when reflecfing back on it. Knowing all the healing techniques and having breakthroughs is one thing. Physically doing them is another. It takes time. Be curious and compassionate with yourself as you practice - through those awkward early attempts at feeling your feelings, communicating directly, meeting your needs, showing up as yourself and moving through conflicts. You're working with what you've got. And the fact that you're working at it is already remarkable. That said, you're not meant to heal yourself into perfection. The 'best version' of yourself is still human. She may be more practiced, more self-aware and self-confident. She may have mastered the skills that you're learning and she may be more comfortable in her skin. But she's not exempt from being human. She procrastinates too sometimes. She accidentally hurts someone's feelings. She says the wrong things. She gets angry. She gets off track. She makes mistakes. She does something stupid. She feels lost and confused. She goes through her personal winters. But she understands that this is normal. And she knows how to handle these things as they happen. She knows how to sit down with herself and get curious as to why she is feeling out of alignment in her life, her work, her relationships. She listens until the answer appears. And then she takes the steps to realign herself. And she knows that this is an ongoing process as she changes and grows throughout her life. That each evolution brings new things and unlocks different aspects of self to discover and get to know. She sees it as part of the fun. 💌 If you are ready to transform your relationship with yourself, I have 5 spots in my 1:1 coaching program, Self-Love Mastery. Comment "mastery" to learn more. Noemi ❤️
What is your attachment style? Take a second today to reflect on how your relationship with your mother helped to shape your attachment to the world around you. #attachment #attachmentstyles #anxiousattachment #dismissiveavoidant #secureattachment #fearfulavoidantattachment #mothersday #development #psychology #lovelanguage #bowlby #ainsworth #securebase #therapy
One of the client conversations I’ve been LOVING recently, is about when to push forward, and when to pull back when dating, especially in the early stages… It’s probably one of the most common dating dilemma’s out there. It raises questions like… 👉 Should the guy always make the first move? 👉 Who should initiate the ‘what are we’ conversation? 👉 Are you being in your ‘masculine’ if you suggest the next date? 👉 When do you bring up what you’re looking for? 👉 Does being in your ‘feminine’ mean having to wait or be passive? It can be bloody confusing. SO, let’s make things simple! Read the slides for your go to guide on what to do. C x
I love this one because it's not about being broken but about setting yourself free and breaking the glass that holds you in!
What are you doing for self-love today?! Or what is self-love mean for you?
It's important to recognize that attachment styles are not static and can evolve over time with self-awareness, personal growth, and supportive relationships. ❤️ Additionally, individuals may exhibit different attachment styles in different relationships or contexts, depending on factors such as their partner's attachment style and the level of perceived security in the relationship. Which attachment style do you think you are? 🤔 #attachmentstyles #relationshipattachmentstyles #secureattachment #anxiouspreoccupiedattachment #dismissiveavoidanceattachment #fearfulavoidantattachment #therapywork #healyourpast #subconscioustherapy #subconsciousmind #subconscioushealing #drshilpawadhwa #womenentrepreneurs
𝗔𝗿𝗲 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗮 𝗵𝗶𝗴𝗵-𝗮𝗰𝗵𝗶𝗲𝘃𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘄𝗼𝗺𝗮𝗻 𝘄𝗵𝗼 𝗳𝗲𝗲𝗹𝘀 𝗹𝗶𝗸𝗲 ‘𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝘀𝘁𝗿𝗼𝗻𝗴 𝗼𝗻𝗲’ 𝗯𝘂𝘁 𝗱𝗼𝘂𝗯𝘁𝘀 𝘀𝗵𝗲 𝘄𝗮𝘀 𝗽𝗮𝗿𝗲𝗻𝘁𝗶𝗳𝗶𝗲𝗱? This is such a common place to be 🧡 Sometimes it takes my clients months of us working together before they can truly see and acknowledge that what they experienced as a young girl was the invisible trauma of parentification. I get it, gorgeous. It’s very easy to doubt yourself when it comes to believing that you suffered trauma as a child. In fact, that’s one of the hallmarks of parentifiction - holding onto the illusion that you had a ‘happy and normal’ childhood, because the alternative is too painful to bear To fully acknowledge the reality of your childhood somehow feels like a betrayal of your parents or that one parent you’ve spent your life protecting in some way or another. Here’s the thing, gorgeous: You don’t need to ‘know’ that you were parentified to begin healing from it. It’s enough to recognise these 7 symptoms (and there are more) to start the process of changing your experience. You can ‘borrow’ my trust. If you feel like you’ve always had to be the strong one then I can guarantee you were parentified in some way, even if you’re not yet ‘there’ in terms of understanding your story. Perhaps you also recognise friends or family in this description? If so, then please share this post to raise awareness . . . #Parentification #ParentifiedChild #childhoodtrauma #fatherwound #motherwound #motherwoundhealing #parentwound #traumacore #ptsd #emdr #innerchild #innerchildhealing #codependency #selfhealer #selfhealers #gentleparenting #reparentyourself #secureattachment #anxiousattachment #avoidantattachment #emotionalregulation #childhoodtraumahealing #fearfulavoidantattachment #LostChildhood #childhoodlost
Peter A. Levine, PhD - Waking the Tiger: Healing Trauma #attachment #attachmentstyles #attachmenttheory #attachmentparenting #insecure #insecureattachment #secure #secureattachment #anxious #anxiousattachment #anxiouspreoccupied #dismissive #dismissiveattachment #dismissiveavoidant #dismissiveavoidantattachment #fearful #fearfulattachment #fearfulavoidantattachment #disorganized #disorganizedattachment #trauma #healing #goodreads #quotes
At the heart of attachment is a powerful emotional bond; a bond characterised by feelings of love, trust, and affection. It is a deep emotional connection formed in childhood. It is the bond between parent and child. ❤️ The child relies on the parent or caregiver for survival and security. People who are attached to each other tend to want to be physically close. This is especially true for infants and young children, who require closeness to their caregivers to feel safe. ❤️ Contrary to the misconception that attachment fosters dependence, it's a crucial catalyst for healthy social and emotional development. Attachment provides a sense of security and safety. When we are attached to someone, we know they will be there for us when needed. We do not fear they will abandon us. ❤️ Attachment provides a secure base from which individuals can explore the world around them. When we know we have someone to return to, we are more likely to take risks and explore new things. ❤️ Providing a sense of security and safety empowers individuals to explore the world around them and develop trusting relationships, thereby promoting independence. ❤️ As we move into adulthood, our early attachment predicts how we show up in our romantic partnerships and close friendships. Attachment theory, developed by John Bowlby, suggests our childhood experiences form a blueprint for future relationships. This blueprint is called our attachment style – these include: 💟 Anxious 💟 Avoidant 💟 Secure 💟 Fearful/avoidant If you want to develop deeper connections within your relationships, deep dive into discovering your attachment style! . . . . . . #attachment #attachment #attachmenttheory #relationships #attachmentstyle #secure #anxious #avoidant #fearfulavoidant #secureattachment #anxiousattachment #avoidantattachment #fearfulavoidantattachment #relationships ❤️❤️
Are you a Fearful Avoidant? DM to find out how you can start recovering and have the best relationship of your life. 💌 #fearfulavoidant #fearfulavoidantattachment
Common themes I see with people who have a Fearful Avoidant Attachment Style 👀 Pay attention to people, situations, and environments that bring out the best in you, and bring more of into your life! Helpful tip: Use these slides as affirmations. For attachment support, you can learn more about 1-1 coaching via the link in my bio ✨
Sending love to all my anxious attachers doing the work 🫶🏼 What activates or triggers you into your anxious behaviors tends to be unique to each individual, so working with someone to uncover these activations can be helpful in working through them and heal, so that you can bring your present, authentic, secure self to the relationship and connect from the heart, and not self-sabotage out of the connection you crave. Remember, attachment styles are fluid and you can work to build a secure attachment and partnership. This is what help my clients with. Message to schedule a consult and start coaching 1-on-1 🤍 And follow for more dating & relationship tips! #anxiousattachment #anxiousattachmentstyle #avoidant #avoidantattachment #avoidantattachmentstyle #fearfulavoidant #fearfulavoidantattachment #fearfulavoidantattachmentstyle #attachmentstyles #emotionalintelligence #datingcoach #relationshipcoach #datingtips #relationshiptips #relationshipexpert #relationshipadvice #victoriamiretti
Fearful avoidants can be very confusing to a partner in a relationship because they often experience mood swings, send mixed signals, and create a push-pull dynamic. They have usually experienced some type of trauma in childhood and want to connect deeply but struggle to trust that anyone can ever meet their needs or show up well for them. They have very little faith that other people can be trusted. Having a fearful avoidant attachment style is very painful for the fearful avoidant. They often struggle to express their needs, set boundaries, and relax in the security of the relationship. They have constant anxiety about the stability of the relationship and the trustworthiness of their partner. They are intense feelers and are often easily hurt by even small misunderstandings or perceived rejections. While they can appear spiteful outwardly, their ultimate desire is closeness and connection that feels safe and solid, but they struggle on proper ways to achieve it. They often engage in protest behaviors which sabotages the very closeness they crave. Maybe you are an FA tired of the painful cycle you are in or you notice these unproductive, dysfunctional behaviors are harming your relationship. Or maybe you are struggling to navigate a turbulent, confusing relationship with someone you think may be an FA. There is help and there is hope. Sign up for 1:1 coaching today. https://linktr.ee/lesliewellsconnectioncoach #attachmentstyles #personalcoach #relationshipcoaches #relationshipcoach #insecureattachment #disorganizedattachment #fearfulavoidantattachment #earnsecureattachment
Healing yourself is connected with healing others!❤️ Lately, I’ve been mentally engaged in a healing process. Recently, I’ve discovered what has always held me back in relationships. I have a fearful-avoidant attachment style in dating. This means that when I build a connection with someone new, I quickly feel “trapped” and “suffocated.” This is mainly because I don’t know my own boundaries well enough and don’t act on them. I want to be close with someone, but at the same time, I also want distance, and it always ends with me stopping everything to regain my sense of self. Recently, I found a therapist who can really help me with this. I finally felt seen and understood. I know everyone around me wanted to help, but the advice I received along the way often didn’t resonate with me. It can feel so lonely at times. So, with this post, I mainly want to say that you’re not alone. I’m sure there are more people among my followers who recognize themselves in my story. And the best part? You can change this pattern. Don’t expect it to happen overnight. If you’ve been following a pattern your whole life, it will take time to change. But it’s possible! I’m still at the beginning of my healing process, but I know it will work out! Trust yourself and the future! Do you recognize yourself in this too? Let me know!🌸and remember: you are not alone!❤️
#disorganizedattachment #divorced #divorceresolution #dontsettle #drawer #emotionalmaturity #emotionalunavailability #fearfulavoidant #fearfulavoidantattachment #fire #floraandmusa #floraxstella #fyp #gaslighting #gestiondesemotions #girlfriend #girlstalk #goodvibes #greenflags #grownwomanshit #guidedmediation #guvenproblemi #handle #hardto #healthyboundaries #heartbreak #imjustsaying #independentwoman #inspiration #inspirationalquotes
Who is replanting themselves?
Dismissive avoidant attachments, surround yourself with people, situations and experiences that help you grow and become the best version of yourself. Helpful tip: Use these slides as affirmations 😃 For support on my practical go-to strategies for embodying your Secure Self™, you can learn more about attachment coaching with me via the link in my bio.
Whether you’re anxious, avoidant, fearful, or secure, we all have the desire to be known, loved, and wanted. We all need a connection to others to survive. And interestingly enough, people with anxious, avoidant, and fearful attachments struggle with vulnerability, communicating their needs, and self-confidence. While there are definitely big differences between anxious and avoidant (with fearful falling somewhere in the middle), it’s important that everyone with an insecure attachment struggles with the same thing: abandonment and a past with unpredictable caregivers. While the anxiously attached developed patterns of needing constant connection and reassurance to survive their fear of abandonment, people with an avoidant attachment learned to become independent and need more space. Meanwhile, people with a fearful attachment start by expressing patterns similar to an anxious attachment and, as the relationship strengthens, pull away more like an avoidant. It’s important to remember these are all learned behaviors from our childhood experiences. It’s how we developed to survive. When we look at the patterns and behaviors through that lens, we’re able to have more compassion for one another as we work toward healing. #attachment #attachmentstyles #attachmenttheory #anxiousattachment #anxiousattachmentstyle #anxiouslyattached #avoidantattachment #fearfulavoidantattachment #healthyrelationships #relationshiptherapist
Sending love to all my avoidants doing the work 🫶🏼 What activates or triggers you into your avoidant behaviors tends to be unique to each individual, so working with someone to uncover these activations can be helpful in working through them and heal, so that you can bring your present, authentic, secure self to the relationship and connect from the heart, and not self-sabotage out of the connection you crave. Remember, attachment styles are fluid and you can work to build a secure attachment and partnership. This is what help my clients with. Message to schedule a consult and start coaching 1-on-1 🤍 And follow for more dating & relationship tips! #avoidant #avoidantattachment #avoidantattachmentstyle #fearfulavoidant #fearfulavoidantattachment #fearfulavoidantattachmentstyle #anxiousattachment #anxiousattachmentstyle #attachmentstyles #emotionalintelligence #datingcoach #relationshipcoach #datingtips #relationshiptips #relationshipexpert #relationshipadvice #victoriamiretti
Sure, each insecure attachment style has its differences, but they are all under the same umbrella because they share these similarities: ✨ Struggles forming and maintaining healthy relationships ✨ Difficulty expressing and regulating their emotions ✨ Have a fear of intimacy ✨ Developed patterns and behaviors to survive as a result of their childhood experiences with their caregivers Do you wonder what your attachment style is? Take my free quiz by clicking the link in my bio! #attachmenttheory #attachmentstyles #insecureattachment #anxiousattachment #anxiousattachmentstyle #anxiouslyattached #avoidantattachment #avoidantattachmentstyle #fearfulavoidantattachment #fearfulattachment
Anxious attachments, pay attention to when you feel your best ✨ Add more of those people, situations and experiences into your life. Helpful tip: Use these slides as affirmations 😃 For support on my practical go-to strategies for embodying your Secure Self™, you can learn more about attachment coaching with me via the link in my bio.
📝 Dear AP, A letter from an Avoidant to the Anxious-Preoccupied. #anxious #anxiousattachment #anxiouspreoccupied #dismissive #dismissiveavoidant #dismissiveavoidantattachment #fearful #fearfulavoidant #fearfulavoidantattachment #disorganized #disorganizedattachment #secure #becomingsecure #earnedsecureattachment #letters #relationships
And that is okay.
Magnify your strengths not your weaknesses! Or which means: 💜 Focus on what you are doing well instead of what you aren't. ❤️ Focus on what you want and finding solutions for it instead of your problems.
You can do it 🤗 As someone who went from a veteran avoidant to fearful/anxious BIGTIME (that’s another story!) to secure and seen many client do the same you CAN move from fearful to secure. And I know you’ve done HUGE self-work already. Anyone and everyone that has come to my space is already committed to the growth, YOU NOW want the 🏆 . The prize of secure attachment. So how do you go from FA to SA? 🙋🏻♀️You do that by working on your… 1️⃣Nervous system: your nervous system is out of WHACK. Why wouldn’t it be with all that hypervigilance trying to keep you safe? It’s time we gave it some time off. It’s time we stepped in and helped it heal and say, “ Thank YOU! We can take it from here! 2️⃣Need for safety: we have to help you feel safe. imagine what feeling are would look like? You’d be able to have great relationships, you’d be sure of your decisions, you’d be choosing people wisely. you wont be second guessing yourself EVERY.SECOND.EVERY DAY 3️⃣Challenging those pesky negative thoughts: What did he mean by that? Can I trust him? Is he going to take advantage of me? Im SURE he is up to something. It’s draining. WE 👏DON’T 👏WANT 👏THAT ANYMORE:👏 NO, THANK YOU 👋 In my Secure Attacher .2.0 course, I teach all about this and many other tools, mindsets, and insights to get you to be secure. Embody secure. It’s new & updated and you will love it. Just the other day, a few of my members said “ I can’t believe I used to pull that shit, and then I”D be upset ALL day, and nothing had even happened…” “I lost so many relationships because of this and it makes me sad that it could have been different” It’s okay. We still have time. You didnt know what you didnt know. Don’t underestimate the power of your own ability (by God’s grace) to change your life 🥳 COMMENT “SECUREME” to get in. It’s invitation only. 🤗 Shabana 😇 #fearfulavoidant #fearfulavoidantattachment #dismissiveavoidant #secureattachmentstyle #secureattachment #securerelationships
Your attachment style developed as a suvival skill 🪴 where you began negotiating with your primary caregivers to figure out how to get your needs met 🌻Depending on how your caregivers responded to you (communicating your needs) that will shape how you perceive safety/love and the means you go about getting it . . . #avoidantattachment #avoidantpersonalitydisorder #avoidantattachmentstyle #anxiousattachment #anxiousattachmentstyle #fearfulavoidant #fearfulavoidantattachment #preoccupiedattachment #dismissiveavoidant #dismissiveavoidantattachment #dismissiveavoidants #selflove #selflovejourney #selflovedeficitdisorder #modernmentalhealth #upandcoming #therapistsofinstagram #therapy
Why taking on responsibility for others’ problems is not the kindness you think it is One of the key reasons that life feels heavy for women who were parentified as young girls is because they tend to take on responsibility for the needs, emotions, and problems of everyone around them. This drive to continue to be ‘the strong one’, even when you’re struggling inside, is a remembered strategy from childhood. Lacking a safe, mature, and emotionally regulated adult who could step up and be the parent you needed, you learned deep in your bones that YOU were the only one who has what it takes to make sure that you and your family are OK. You downloaded a blueprint for relationships designed around the belief that you’ll ONLY get to feel safe and cared for if you first take care of everyone else’s needs. I get it, gorgeous 🧡 I spent decades living this way Focused on the emotions and problems of friends and family to the exclusion of my own needs But, here’s the thing . . . Assuming responsibility for others’ needs is a profound act of disempowerment It feels like kindness and caring But it’s based on a deep mistrust that your loved one or friend can take care of themselves The paradox is that when you try and fix or take on energetic responsibility for what rightfully is the responsibility of another person, you often inadvertently hold that unmet need, emotion, or problem in place Because, when you stop the other person from fully experiencing the consequences of their actions or inaction, you rob them of the very experience they need to catalyse action and change the situation for themselves. By allowing others the consequences of their actions, you’re not ‘letting them down’ or ‘feeding them to the wolves’, gorgeous. Instead, you’re handing back the power that was rightfully theirs in the first place and sending them a powerful message that you believe in their ability to find an answer for themselves It’s a win-win - you increase the likelihood that the person you care so deeply about moves out of the pain they're in, while lightening your load and creating much needed space to meet your own needs, wants and desires ✨
Sending love to all my anxious attachers navigating the dating scene 🫶🏼 Remember that what activates you into your anxious behaviors tends to be unique to each individual, so working with someone to uncover these activations can be helpful in working through them and heal so that you can bring your authentic self to the relationship and connect from the heart. Attachment styles are fluid and you can work to build a secure attachment and partnership. This is what help my clients with. Message to schedule a consult and start coaching 1-on-1 🤍 And follow for more dating & relationship tips! #anxiousattachment #anxiousattachmentstyle #avoidant #avoidantattachment #avoidantattachmentstyle #fearfulavoidant #fearfulavoidantattachment #fearfulavoidantattachmentstyle #attachmentstyles #emotionalintelligence #datingcoach #relationshipcoach #datingtips #relationshiptips #relationshipexpert #relationshipadvice #victoriamiretti
You are worth it! Like a battery we cannot continue to go until we are depleted. We need rest. We need to replenish ourselves. We need time off. How do you rest or take time out from your busy day?
The thought ‘I miss my ex’ can be extremely overwhelming, often because we assign the negative emotion to that specific person. While there is an important place for acknowledging the unique connection, we also want to recognize that ‘missing’ includes quite a few things that can be filled by ourselves, connection with others, learning certain tools, creating new activities and more. When we can depersonalize the missing and start to fill those voids, we can move through suffering more quickly.
Sending love to all my avoidants navigating the dating scene 🫶🏼 Remember, what activates you into your avoidant behaviors is unique to each individual, so working with someone to uncover these activations can be helpful in healing them so that you can bring your authentic self to the relationship and connect from the heart, and not self-sabotage out of the connection/relationship you crave. Attachment styles are fluid and you can work to build a secure attachment and partnership. This is what help my clients with. Message to schedule a consult and start coaching 1-on-1 🤍 And follow for more dating & relationship tips! #avoidant #avoidantattachment #avoidantattachmentstyle #fearfulavoidant #fearfulavoidantattachment #fearfulavoidantattachmentstyle #anxiousattachment #anxiousattachmentstyle #attachmentstyles #emotionalintelligence #datingcoach #relationshipcoach #datingtips #relationshiptips #relationshipexpert #relationshipadvice #victoriamiretti
If you have anxious aspects to your attachment style, then you may have a tendency of jumping to conclusions, catastrophizing, and assuming worse case scenarios. Make sure you’re challenging your insecurities so they don’t hinder your relationships 👊🏽❤️✨
Posted @withregram • @thejessicadasilva Every attachment style has their struggles when it comes to matters of the heart. Understanding yours can give you great insights into your relational patterns 💡Know that it’s 100% possible to shift your patterns. Love doesn’t have to feel so confusing or conflicting. You can learn to the tools to navigate your challenges in healthier ways. For support on learning the steps to embodying a more authentic and secure version of you, DM @thejessicadasilva the word SUPPORT. • • • #selflove #boundaries #mentalhealth #anxiety #healing #mindset #empowerment #toxiclove #relationshipcoach #codependency #trauma #loveaddiction #attachmenttheory #needs #mindfulness #selfdevelopment #couplestherapy #attachmentcoach #attachmenttherapist #relationships #attachmentstyles #selfhealers #relationshipanxiety #anxiousattachment #fearfulavoidantattachment #avoidantattachment #dismissiveavoidant #secureattachment #disorganizedattachment
ATTACHMENT..... part of human-life. #psychology #attachmentstyles #avoidantattachment #secureattachmentstyle #fearfulavoidantattachment #dismissiveavoidantattachment #lowanxiety #highanxiety #lowavoidance #highavoidance